Hell froze over so it appears the DC Metro Area has decided to fill the gap. It hasn't hit the high of 100 yet but it is quickly on the way. Of course there is the horrible Heat Index; obviously the invention of a masochist. 100 is all I need to hear. You don't need to add in "but it will feel like...". Once the mercury climbs that high, it all feels the same - like the skin is melting off my bones and my bones are turning into dust.
I hate the heat.
I don't mind sweating if I'm actually doing something like playing football for example. I do mind sweating when I'm standing still, in the shade, doing nothing.
Ok, enough of my gripe fest. It really has nothing to do with this post other than to mention that it is hot as blazes outside today which means shorts and that in turn means the razor needed to come out this morning. I hop in the shower and damn it, the razor is not where it is supposed to be. Screw it, I've got Veet.
So now my legs are covered in smelly depilatory cream when I realize it's been an hour since Little Man sat on the Potty. I move the potty to our bathroom, pull down the pull up and tell him to sit. As his little tush makes contact with the seat I realize my mistake.
Always, always, ALWAYS check the pull up first.
I now have poop on the seat. No biggie. Easy clean up. Also get Little Man cleaned up. All while trying to keep the Veet intact on my legs, not on everything else in the bathroom. I managed that contortion without any major pops, snaps, or pulled muscles.
Then I have Little Man step out of the pull up. Carefully or so I thought.
Not only did a turd fall out of the stupid pull up but he then managed to step in it.
Did I mention my bath mat is white?
I'm now left trying to clean up a dirty seat, a dirty bum, a dirty foot, a dirty bath mat and calm a crying child who thinks he did something wrong.
With Veet all over my legs.
No comments:
Post a Comment